Kerri Russ

I do feel like the actions I've taken this month have helped me, my family, and my community.  It's not easy to make these types of changes and I'm hoping I can do more now that I've had a good start!

I need to be more active... but I fell 2 months ago (sideways to the cement garage floor) and my left knee is extremely sensitive right now.  If I sit for more than 15 minutes without standing up, my knee locks up and I feel like my great grandmother trying to stand up.  After a few steps, I'm good.  Going down stairs is right out... each step down causes knee pain.

So... how do I work on being more active when walking distances, like I used to do, is painful and I fear another fall?   We've got a Bowflex... but I can count on one hand how many times any of the 3 of us in the house has used it since we got it 15 years ago.  We've also got a treadmill and a smaller stationary bike that can collapse for storage.

I'm going to challenge myself to do one of those this week... I can do my arms on the Bowflex without any issues with my knee.  I can do the treadmill for 15 minutes at a time, prepared to stop if my knee has issues.  The bike... I doubt I can use the bike... it is set for my husband and the seat is just too high.

But I have 2 options right now... I must try them... I must get more active!

My husband and I had discussions early in our marriage about "need" vs. "want."  I believe that distinction is different for men and women, and I don't think we even think about it much.  Men have traditionally been in charge of the purse strings in most relationships and women are in charge of the home.  Control of money and housewifery are concepts that have changed tremendously over the last several decades as more and more women have high-powered and high-paying jobs and more men are taking care of the children and homes when possible.  But men are all about need, ruled by the intellect or brain... I need this to complete this task, I need that so this person can do whatever...  usually for the home or family in general.  If it's not "needed," there's no reason to have it.  Women tend to be more in touch with emotions... this would be nice to have, so and so would like to have this, I'm sure.  These lines blur, of course, among individuals, but at least that's what I've found from my observances of our family, my folks, and others I know.

I know I'm ruled by my wants rather than my needs.  My husband tends to buy things we need... new skillet, new garbage disposal, new cordless rechargeable vacuum cleaner, etc.  Things for the family to use but rarely things he really wants (and he just doesn't want many things).  I, on the other hand, NEED to buy crafting supplies and clothes (for all of us) and decorations and food that isn't needed for a recipe.  These are all things that are usually for me, personally or to use to create, and usually benefit no one.

So that is why I chose the need vs. want challenge.  I wanted to challenge myself to THINK about my purchases or my wants and match them more closely to my needs.  I know I want to buy several more dozen strands of stone beads for my jewelry projects but with more beads than I know what to do with now, do I NEED those new beads?  No.  I WANT them.  Therefore, I didn't buy them.  I visited a clothing website to find a cute T-shirt for Halloween.  In the process, I found a few other shirts on sale.  They're ON SALE!  But do I need more shirts?  Nope... not unless I buy a new closet, too.  So... I didn't buy them.

Two victories in the need vs. want column.  It's an ongoing challenge, but one that I need to continue.  I was thinking maybe when I have these victories, I put whatever money I WOULD HAVE spent into the savings account, see how fast it will grow NOT spending that money.  It's worth a look-see!

How do YOU deal with wants vs. needs?

The weather right now is exactly why we live in Oregon.  When it goes overcast and rainy, we're in heaven in our house.  The windows go open so air can come in.  We go for more walks, even though it means soaked clothing and foggy glasses.  We sit in the house, bundled up and binging our favorite shows.  Our big family holiday, Thanksgiving is on the horizon, as is my husband's Halloween birthday (just like my dad before him!), so this season is our time to come out of our hot weather cocoon and enjoy nature in all of her wet glory.

What is your favorite season and why?

Ya know what makes this more fun than I anticipated?  My husband and son joining me in doing some of them over the weekend!  As a family, we sat and discussed what is important to us and what things we can work on as a family to bring us closer and provide more calm and satisfying interactions.  Having a teenager isn't easy, especially when I remember what a horrible teen I was.  Luckily, my son is more thoughtful and considerate to his parents than I was at his age.  But we talk and compromise, which helps us know each other better.  The hubby and I went for a walk in a large local park, playing Pokémon Go for exercise, and we sat under some trees for a half-hour or so and just listened to the birds, enjoyed the light misty rain that started to fall, and really were thankful we live where we do... lovely trees and rain!

It's not easy breaking from the rut of day-to-day living and actually paying attention to sleep, nature, time, and needs v. wants.  We get into our routines... waking, showering, dressing, driving, walking, working, eating, working, driving, watching TV, and sleeping... it's a never-ending cycle that becomes rote and mindless.  Re-learning how to be mindful of taking time to look around, enjoy, and reflect on what I'm actually doing each day is much more work that I thought.  I'll keep at it, though... it's all I can do is take each day as it comes and try, try again. :-)